I was rejected for the sixtieth time.
Every literary agent that read The Yoga of Max’s Discontent’s first three chapters had the same feedback:
“I couldn’t get into the story.”
“I didn’t relate to Max.”
“The premise is fascinating but the execution didn’t grab me.”
Then, the 61st agent took the time to read the whole manuscript. Her rejection was more constructive:
“Once the protagonist gets to India, you lose yourself completely in the story but the first part in New York falls flat.”
I read the book for the millionth time. This time, I saw the problem. In the first 30 pages set in New York, Max was thinking. He was trying to make major life decisions by analyzing, reflecting, and debating the pros and cons.
It doesn’t work.
The hero doesn’t debate.
The hero does.
A character reveals himself by action. S/he moves forward, falls, learns, picks up the pieces, acts, stumbles again, and eventually he gets somewhere. Most likely, he’ll end up in a completely different place than he intended to but he’ll be deeper, wiser, more three-dimensional from having acted. Life is movement, action, growth, transformation.
I re-vamped the novel completely. Instead of over-thinking his past, Max visits the violent Bronx neighborhood he grew up in in the dead of the night. Rather than over-planning his future, he plunges ahead. In every page, he learns what he should do by acting not reflecting.
Within a week of making the fix, I had multiple literary agent offers. In a month, I had a worldwide book deal.
The hero does.
In stories and in life.
A year ago, Kerry and I were wondering whether it made sense to have a second kid in the midst of full-time start-up jobs and a book launch. We went ahead anyway. Rumi came in the middle of everything—and it’s busy and amazing. A couple of years ago, we launched an online business thinking we’d live in Costa Rica and manage it remotely. It failed. But I learnt more than I would have by not doing it. And that opened new doors. Life didn’t work out the way we intended. It seldom does. But it expands.
Don’t be the rejected Max.
You know deep down what you have to do. Don’t think about your start-up idea. Start. Don’t debate whether you should take up that job outside your city. Move.
Half the time you’ll make the wrong decision, the other half you’ll be lying on the floor wondering why you bit off more than you can chew. But with each decision you’ll handle complexity better, you’ll discover deeper and deeper reservoirs of strengths within you until one day there’ll be nothing in this world of men and hobbits that won’t be within your reach.
Decide don’t debate. Do it now not later.
Start living your story today.

Like WHAT
KARAN HAS TO SAY?
SIGN UP FOR WEEKLY UPDATES. IT'S FREE!
31 Responses to “The one thing writing teaches you about life.”
My journey is an interior one. For 18 months I have mourned the unexpected death of my partner. We were and are deeply bonded, and I have no desire to “move on” to another attachment in the material world. I have struggled with deep depression and a lack of any desire to keep on living. I am situated somewhere on the autism spectrum, high performing but with a real aversion to close relationships, hence the to me sacrality of my partner bond. For all this time I have struggled to find a reason, an inspiration of any kind to continue in life, and just recently experienced am overwhelming recurrence of the sadness that fills a whole universe, tears without end. I think that it may have been a catharsis of so,e kind, opening a window to a glimpse of a life beyond self, a life where everything doesn’t relate to “me” but just is. Although my education, my work, and my inclination have always pointed in the direction of some kind of nontheistic spirituality, and over the course of my life I have had my share of ecstatic experiences (with and without hallucinogens), a real desire to lay down my self is new to me. I can see that secretly I thought I was personally on to something when I couldn’t have been further away from it. This is the time in my life for surrender.
Wendy, thank you for sharing. I deeply feel you having been through a recent loss myself. Did you ever consider going for a Vipassana course near you? I would highly, highly recommend it since you may find the answers you’re seeking very, very close. http://www.karanbajaj.com/yoga-meditation/vipassana-meditation/
Dear Karen
I live how easy you make everything feel. You’re a great source of inspiration for me. I do write at snail’s pace but I do believe I’m going to finish writing my book this year. Thanks for the mentoring.
Sorry Karan not Karen. My auto correct is awful.
Ashwina, can’t wait for it! You’ll be a hugely successful graduate of the Book Deal Course, I know.
“Once the protagonist gets to India, you lose yourself completely in the story but the first part in New York falls flat.” – No I don’t think so. I liked the first part and it really caught my attention. We Indians live in dreams. The picture of America is like a dream to many of us. But the picture you gave about Max is not very familiar to us. I had seen a few hollywood movies showing this scenario. The Himalaya part is like an unexplored destination and that is my personal favourite. So I liked both.
People take decisions… some get successful and some end up in failure. That doesn’t mean we have done a right decision or a wrong one… Because first of all why we take that decision ? Something inside us prompted us to do that ! I feel if one is getting through in his decision without a hassle means that decision is right and if there is too many obstacles inspite of giving your 100% , that means there is some indication from that almighty that the decision is not right…
“Life didn’t work out the way we intended. It seldom does. But it expands.” as you said,
Failure do expands our vision and opens up several unexplored doors … Lets hope for the best…..
All the best for Your book ….
Thanks Swayam for sharing as well as liking the first section! Much appreciated.
Hi Karan,
What has drawn me and inspired me and then healed me is simply the fact – that life does not stop – we may also call it the continuity of life. Nothing stops in life for anything or anybody. You could be down and out but a new day will always come – nothing can and will stop it- and that is the beauty of life.
The sooner we realise it the better it is for us only. We need to move at our own pace, no pressure, no pushing just try and flow with the day. Start by feeling the sun, the breeze and actually just about everything around you – just feel it- dont react just feel and then once you start feeling without giving it a meaning – a conclusion , everything becomes more relaxing and we then can JUST BE.
So Karan tha’st my story for now.
Nothing stops.
Beautiful Payal, wonderful words. Reminds me of that old Buddhist saying that you never step into the same river twice. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much for asking. My first book titled Soulmates Never Part was a story close to my heart. I did give it to a publisher but there was no response. Then, instead giving it to other publishers and waiting for the mandatory six months for a reply and all that, I went in for self publishing with Partridge Publishing. They did print the book and make it available online only. You know how difficult it is to get readers to know about your book online. When a book is traditionally published it, is there in the bookstalls for the readers who actually want to purchase books, to see it. Even though everyone who has read my book has liked it, I wonder if I should start working on my next one. I do have a story which again is very personal and close to my heart, and is about love/mystery/reincarnation and would be deep. But since I just am not sure about publishers accepting it readily and I am not really energetic enough to run after them. Also, having gone for self publishing once, it would be silly to go for that option once more. Is there any way by which a publisher assures me that he would be willing to do my book? If so, I would be happy to plunge into writing the story right away. I seek your advice. Regards, Shampa
Shampa, did you read this post? My suggestion is: use some of these techniques to sell 10,000+ copies of your first book and then, you should find it relatively easy to get publisher attention for the next one. http://www.karanbajaj.com/writing-creativity/how-to-sell-150000-copies-of-your-books-in-india/
Karan,
My story of a life less lived in regards to writing began when I was in gr.12. I had an english teacher tell me I was stupid, which didn’t bode well as I loved English + writing. While it halted my ability to write and still does at times, I pushed forward through many other perimeters in my life to now I’m pushing those boundaries with my writing. Your podcast with Cate Stillman came at a perfect time as I plan to stop buying so many books on how to ‘be’ and instead continue to follow the path of being lost in the woods, which did happen to me when I was listening. I love the first word of the Yoga Sutras, Atha. Now. Because it always starts now, right in the moment so what foot are you gonna step forward with? Are you willing to get lost in the woods? As I start to navigate the process of writing my first book on yoga, this blog came at a beautiful time with a reminder of Now. Atha. Thanks Karan.
Tahnee, what a lovely, inspiring story. Thank you for sharing! I’ll be the first to read your book–do keep me updated on the journey and let me know if I can help in any way with writing/publishing.
Thanks Karan for your emails are wonderful, inspiring and full of hope. At every step, life takes us through transformation. I am going through one right now. I am going within and trying to understand what i want to do with myself at this moment. I am struggling with conflicting thoughts, the need to take risk, step out and be on my own for a while. I feel I should take the leap of faith and soon I will…
Supriya, do it! Take the leap. I’ve seen it works out even if it doesn’t seem to.
Hi Karan,
Every time your mail comes , I read till the last word. Good to know that your chapter of writing this book has ended, hope you enjoyed and would share your experiences in the coming one. Coincidentally my Mumbai chapter comes to an end this month and am set to explore a new city -where I have promised myself to go for little meditations , yoga and gym. Will connect soon but right now am rushing to get my things done wrapping up professionally and personally from the beautiful city. one thing i suggest do come to marine drive and sit from bright moon to shaded morning sky- u will connect . It was one beautiful experience of Mumbai that I had experienced recently. andTthat was amazing .
Excellent Manu, a small chance we will be moving to Mumbai so this message is very timely! Thank you for sharing.
Dear Karan,
I find myself returning to your posts again and again. Thank you for your advice and intuition. Your videos have been very helpful–I appreciate how much you do to support other writers and share your journey.
Thank you Rebecca, glad I can be of some help. Thank you for your thoughtful comment.
Hi sir,
Sir my book is published but low on sales.
please give me some tips to boost sales.
http://www.karanbajaj.com/writing-creativity/how-to-sell-150000-copies-of-your-books-in-india/
Hi Karan,
Your Book The Seeker is very close to my heart. I read while on a vacation. Each and every word had so much meaning in it. It is certainly going to be my all time favourite. I even shared it with my friend and gifted one to another Yogini friend of mine. There is something in that story that calls you repeatedly. I feel i ll need to read it at least 10 times to get close understanding even a fraction of my own life. Thats how I feel. You are awesome.. truely brilliant!!!
Sonia, that truly means a lot. The Seeker is my deepest, most heart-felt story and few have understood it like you did. Thank you.
Good stuff Karan. Keep the flags flying high!
Cheers
Nitin
BIT Mesra 93
Thanks man!
Hi Karan! I really enjoy your blog posts and advice on writing and life. I left my miserable corporate job last summer and have spent almost a year trying to find myself, but I chose to think instead of do. I bet you can guess where it got me: Not as far as I would have liked. I struggle with the paralysis triggered by fear and the unknown. I struggle to know what I should do or where to go to explore myself. I feel like I could be a great story in the making, but right now I am sitting in NY thinking (not literally). I have always had a tug to write and I have always suppressed it. Your story is inspirational and shows us that you can have a job and a passion at the same time successfully. I just picked up your new book, I’m excited to read it.
Harmony, I’m touched by your comment. Thank you for sharing. Seems like you’re well on the path now and I’m very sure there was a movement, an energy in your “break” year which’ll actually come through when you start putting your thoughts down. Excited for you!
I really liked this post. Having too many choices and debating them endlessly kills our mojo. Do you have a blog post about your failed costa rica venture? Would love to read it.
Soon Amit!
Oh my Karan, I just enjoyed your post so much. Thank you for the sharing such beautiful inspiring thoughts. I must say as I type this I am very much entering a deep and vast space where truly everything is unfamiliar. I too believe life is not to be lived passively and that we very much need to take on an active role other wise we limit our own growth and bliss, no real joy in living safely, I found the experiences you shared to be of great encouragement today. I am so grateful our paths have crossed. Thank you.
Kathy, thank you for your lovely thoughts. Very well said indeed, “no joy in living safely”, it takes a while to realize.